Free Write

I think I have always had what some might call an irrational fear of something terrible happening to me- never being able to bear children, finding out I have cancer only after it has consumed most of me, being the responsible driver and stopping at a red light but the 18-wheeler behind me deciding not to, being the one to greet a stray bullet with a vital organ- ya know, that type of stuff. I do pray every day that God keeps me safe and these fears don't live at the forefront and therefore do not run my life. While I am not at all afraid to die, I would rather it not be tragic and ruin the funeral my mother is leaving me no choice other than to have (I would rather just be cremated. No point of making a fuss for me). But I do believe that because I am always cautious of the extreme, my life is more rewarding in some aspects. I love hard enough for me and everyone else. When I am fed up, I can make people and things instantly obsolete. When I am happy, I share with others and I will admit that I have on occasion shared sadness and anger too. When I am passionate about something, everyone is gonna feel it. When I make love......well.......*blush*. If my so-called irrational fears make my normalities sweeter, then I hope to keep my visitor's pass to the World of Irrationality forever.

JUSTICE